so i went to five very popular blogs. saw why they were so popular. they were written intentionally with readers in mind. a calculated and strategic writing oriented towars maximum readership. TRP. to each his own, i guess. i asked myself if i could write like that. no. i just couldnt. i am also one of the very few people in today's world who has no aspirations to ever write a book. everyone i know wants to write a book.
i think aristerasays is just for me. there are times when i know what i write may offend some. but then i cant not be myself. so its ok. if it bothers them, they mustnt read it. the other day, over some brownies and irish coffee with a friend we suddenly discussed blogs, at length. he asked me if i had reviewed a particular play, ages ago. well, i had. and how some people had chanced upon my blog on google with reference to that play. i was a little puzzled about the exercise.
me been much better all day today. was a little woozy in the morning. but much better for the rest of the day. mad mad work day that got over only at 11pm. *breathes sigh of relief*
M asked me the other day about all my friends and what they do. well. esoteric lot, them. film makers, journos, architects, critics, social-workers, corporate honchos, admen, linguists, teachers, biochemists, designers, yadayadayada. hmmm. and then there is me. i like to pigeon hole and judge. so?
at that point with someone where one needs to take a stand. i think it will go the same way. i need to keep a ready disclaimer "i really like you. you are very sweet. *cautious pause, deep breath* but... i dont think this is going anywhere. i mean, theres nothing wrong with you. its just that i am not ready yet. yadayadayada" *sigh of relief*
its just that i am looking for something quixotic. utopia. but i cant settle for anything less. i really cant. its like, if you have tasted blood once....
there are too many mediocre things in life. love shouldnt be one of them.
its one of those phases, again. the problem is my yardstick. i need to toss it out of the window. but i cant.
so tomorrow is one of those days where a thousand errands need to be run. bills to be paid. room to be cleaned. drawings to be made. study. exam in 6 days *shiver runs down spine*
an unwanted complication in life occured. its so ekta kapur esque, its not funny. i just died. died. just what i needed in the middle of all the mad work load, the sickness and the stress on the parental front. god's sense of humour? *rolls eyes*
long ago i made a tryst with destiny. and now the time has come, when i shall sue the bitch. for breaking the agreement and screwing up my life so. *laughs like a maniac*
its late. and i am sleepy. way past my bedtime. my friend mentioned the other day about the titles of my post. how they have little or nothing at all to do with the post itself. it always has something to do with the post. not explicitly, but the subtext. i love to pick up these titles. the good old college days. so much of these gulzaar songs, so much of pink floyd, so much of bob dylan and duran duran. so much to look forward to. *looks back with a sad sad heart*
i think its time for some hardcore retail therapy. muahahaha.
current colour: burnt pink