aristera says

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

 

it rained last night- 2



it rained last night,
you say.
I didn’t hear it at all.
You said you saw
It fall?
It rained last night,
You say.
You said you heard it smell
The sweet wet earth
I don’t know, well,
Even today,
I see no trace
Of it on the face
Of the road.
Get me a coffee,
Make it strong.
You ask me then,
‘what is wrong?’
I laugh so hard
It makes me cry.
I love you so,
I don’t know why.
‘where’s my coffee?’
I ask.
You love me,
You must.
Love, hate, lust.
I wait.
The coffee must be cold.
I sit by the wall.
I wait for you to bring me a coffee.
It’s been a month.
Why don’t you call?

Comments:
"You said you heard it smell"

Is it supposed to mean what it says, or am I right in thinking some punctuation/line break is missing/inappropriate.

I mostly don't know what to make of poetry that has such a strong stench of the waste/rotting/stagnation, specially when it comes in this rather staccatto free-verse form...these left me with a rather acrimonous taste in my mouth.
 
geetanjali- sometimes you can hear the smell too.
the acrimonous taste...perfect. intended effect...the reader feels the same as the poet. hahaha. bibhatsa rasa (the horrible rasa)
 
I've never heard no smell...guess I'm not as evolved as you ;-)
 
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